Log On: Making da wood stove hotter

Log Off: Don’t add no more wood

Monitor: Keepin an eye on da wood

Download: Getting da wood off da truck

Megahertz: Ven yer not careful getting da firewood

Floppy Disk: Vat yew get from trying tew carry tew much wood

Ram: Dat ting dat splits da wood

Hard Drive: Getting home in da winter time in the snow

Prompt: Vat da mail ain’t in da winter time

Windows: Vat yew shut when it’s cold outside

Screen: Vat yew shut vens it’s black fly season

Byte: Vat dem dang black flies do

Chip: Munchies fer da TV

Microchip:Vats in da bottom of da munchies bag

Modem: Vat yew did tew da hay fields

Keyboard: Where yew hang da keys

Software: Dem dang plastic forks and knives

Mouse: Vat eats da grain in da barn

Mainframe: Holds up da barn roof

Port: Fancy wine

Random Access Memory: Ven yew can’t remember vat yew paid fer da rifle, ven yer wife asks